Truth

Mr. Dewey was briefing his client, who was about to testify in his own
defense. "You must swear to tell the complete truth. Do you understand?"

The client replied that he did. The lawyer then asked, "Do you know what
will happen if you don't tell the truth?"

The client looked back and said, "I imagine that our side will win."

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Drunk Man and a Priest

A drunk man who smelled like beer sat down on a subway seat next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few minutes the man turned t ...

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