Cigarettes

Man's wife asks him to go to the store to buy some cigarettes. So he
walks down to the store only to find it closed. So he goes into a
nearby bar to use the vending machine. At the bar he sees a beautiful
woman and starts talking to her. They have a couple of beers and one
thing leads to another and they end up in her apartment. After they've
had their fun, he realizes its 3AM and says, "Oh no, its so late, my
wife's going to kill me. Have you got any talcum powder?" She gives
him some talcum powder, which he proceeds to rub on his hands and then
he goes home.

His wife is waiting for him in the doorway and she is pretty pissed.
"Where the hell have you been?!?!"

"Well, honey, its like this. I went to the store like you asked, but
they were closed. So I went to the bar to use the vending machine. I
saw this great looking chick there and we had a few drinks and one
thing led to another and I ended up in bed with her."

"Oh yeah? Let me see your hands!"

She sees his hands are covered with powder and... "You God damn
liar!!! You went bowling again!!!"