Maria's Wedding Night

Maria had just got married and being a traditional Italian, she was
still a virgin. So, on her wedding night, staying at her mother's house,
she was nervous. But her mother reassured her. "Don't worry, Maria.
Tony's a good man. Go upstairs and he'll take care of you."

So up she went. When she got upstairs, Tony took off his shirt and
exposed his hairy chest. Maria ran downstairs to her mother and says,
"Mama, Mama, Tony's got a big hairy chest." "Don't worry, Maria," says
the mother," all good men have hairy chests. Go upstairs. He'll take
good care of you."

So, up she went again. When she got up in the bedroom, Tony took off
his pants exposing his hairy legs. Again, Maria ran downstairs to her
mother. "Mama, Mama, Tony took off his pants and he's got hairy legs!"

"Don't worry. All good men have hairy legs. Tony's a good man. Go
upstairs and he'll take good care of you." So up she went again. When
she got up there, Tony took off his socks and on his left foot he was
missing three toes. When Maria saw this, she ran downstairs. "Mama,
Mama, Tony's got a foot and a half!"

"Stay here and stir the pasta," says the mother. "This is a job for
Mama."