Bless Me Father

A man walks into a church confessional and says to the priest,"bless me,father,for i have sinned. "i was with seven women last night"

The priest is silent for a moment,then says "go home and cut seven lemons in half. squeeze the juice into a glass and drink it down in one gulp.

"And i`ll be forgiven?" asks the man.

"No." replies the priest ,"but it will wipe that smirk off your face."

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Priest Playing Golf

A builder and a priest are out for a game of golf one afternoon. Unfortunately the builder wasn't very good at the game and every time he missed a shot would shout 'Sh*t, missed'. The game went on and after several outbursts from the builder; the priest could hold his tongue no longer. "Don ...

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